New Year’s Eve 2016
It was New Year’s Eve. Kind of a cliché because that’s when everyone starts to reflect on the past year…their life. In my married life I was the hostess on New Year’s Eve. We had this great party that became tradition for 13 years. After the divorce, my ex-husband continued it with his new wife. Except this year, my kids didn’t want to go. They had parties with friends they wanted to attend so I gladly accepted the role of taxi driver. I hadn’t seen my kids for the past 3 years on New Year’s Eve so I nixed any plans I had to just be home. Then my daughter informed me she didn’t want to go to her party so it was me and her. Yea!! We got in comfy clothes, hit the store for junk food and headed to my friends place that was actually out of town, but let us use his place as our “party”. It was literally the best New Year’s Eve I’ve had in an incredibly long time. As midnight was approaching, with my daughter by my side, I realized how blessed I truly am. We high fived when midnight struck and entered the New Year together.
New Year’s Day 2017
As I write this you should know my life right now is not roses. It’s actually kind of a hot mess. I will save the details for another time when I can finally say; as Barry Manilow sang “I Made it Through the Rain.” And I will make it.
But what I do realize is that I have a story. If I am blessed to make it to become a happy old lady with grandkids, I’ll have a hell of a story to tell. I believe I was given this life because I would have become bored as hell in the mundane. That being said, it has totally sucked at times, but it has also made me realize how strong I really am. I’ve taken the hits, but I have ALWAYS gotten back up. I’ve had help from my family and friends who I really believe are guardian angels. But it was me. It was me who kept going, it was me who kept having faith, it was me who kept hope that the prayer would be answered, it was me who remained positive when no one else did, and it was me who knew in her gut she could do this and come out better than before. I am on my way. My present circumstances my not show on the outside yet, but on the inside, I know.
Don’t be ashamed of your story. Be proud of it. The people who judge you, and they will, are the ones who don’t have one. Too bad for them. Maybe they took the easy road, maybe they settled, maybe they have no courage, or maybe they are just freaking bored and miserable in their life. They will try to write your story, to change it, to make it more comfortable for them. Don’t let them. You get to decide how you want to live your life. Make your choices based on what’s best for you. YOU! Your story is what makes you great and interesting and inspiring. I’ve lived in different places, been in good relationships and bad, been married and through a miserable divorce, been well off and poor, and worked in multiple jobs where I made good money and I’ve also been unemployed. However, as I began this New Year, I finally realized that I love that I have a story. I love my life. Now…it’s time for the next chapter….:))